Childhood Gifts From My Parents…

Unconditional love is a gift many parents give their children. Since children don’t come with owners manuals… sometimes raising a child into adulthood is a game of “hit or miss”. I was one of the fortunate ones whose parents took their time, evaluating each need and desire I voiced, before deciding on the course of action.

For example, when I was a five-year-old my mother told me I had to wear a dress when I attended my church’s “Kindergarten Choir”. I told my mother I didn’t want to wear a dress because I had to wear one to school everyday. She then proceeded to tell me if I refused to wear one, I would have to tell the church’s choir director I would no longer be in choir.

So, being the independent, stubborn child that I was, I marched myself across the street to the church and told my choir director that I wasn’t going to be in choir anymore. I don’t recall if he asked me why, but I would have told him if he’d asked!

Then, when I was eight years old, I wanted to support a national cause for hunger called, “Walk for Development”. It was a 33 mile walk through downtown Minneapolis, around the “Chain of Lakes” and back to Loring Park, which was in the heart of the city.

Since the walk was the same day as my tap dance recital, my parents told me I could choose which one I wanted to participate in. The first option was the 33 mile walk with my sister and a few church friends, and the second was a dance recital in front of a dozen or so doting parents and family members who would be admiring their children.

Needless to say, I chose the walk! It was a challenge like no other… over 3,000 people walked 33 miles to raise money for hunger! All of my friends “dropped out” so I was left, as an eight-year-old, in downtown Minneapolis at 10:00 PM. When I found a telephone booth, I called my parents and they promptly picked me up. I appreciated their trust in my judgement to continue to the end of the walk, even though everyone I knew had already gone home. Their trust in me fostered an independence in me that was yearning to come out.

When I was nine years old, a neighbor asked if I would babysit for her children. Since I’d played with her children, and her house was only two doors away from mine, my parents agreed to let me take on the responsibility of babysitting.

Well, that job started my babysitting career! I loved kids and thoroughly enjoyed taking care of them… for a few dollars. Fifty cents per hour, to be exact.

One year, I babysat for a neighbor so often that I earned enough money to buy my first 35mm camera. The camera, back then, cost $350.00. Seven hundred hours of babysitting went into the purchase of that camera! With my new camera in hand and a babysitting client as the subject, I won a photo contest. That was the beginning of my photography hobby!

At the age of 15, I went to work as a part-time “inventory clerk” at a big department store in one of the local malls. One day, I was dressed “to the nines” because I was meeting a friend for lunch. When my supervisor inquired why I was not wearing casual clothing for the job that day, I explained I was having lunch with a friend. She then invited me to talk with the personnel director because she wanted to hire me as a salesperson. This was quite the dilemma for me because I’d just accepted a job, in the same mall, at a different location.

After discussing both job opportunities with my parents, they shared their views on both, but told me it was ultimately my decision. I chose the “China, Glassware, and Gifts department at the department store. It was the perfect fit for me!

Also, when I was 15, I was sitting in one of my high school classes wearing a Norwegian sweater. The night before, I had joined the local, “Sons of Norway” organization, so I had a pin with the logo on it, attached to my sweater.

The young high school girl sitting in front of me happened to notice the sweater and pin and decided to strike-up a conversation. “You belong to the Sons of Norway?” she inquired. “Yes, I just joined last night.” I replied. “I’m going to visit my relatives this summer in Norway”, she mentioned.

Instantly, we were bonded over our love of Norway. As it came to pass, we spent many days, during and after class, talking about the country, fjords, hikes in the mountains, and the relatives she was going to visit. Approximately two weeks after meeting this girl, Diana, she invited me to join her on her Norwegian trip!

Ecstatic about the possibility of visiting Norway, hiking in the mountains, and traveling through Europe, I cautiously approached my parents. First, I asked my mom if I could go. Her response was, “Go ask your father.” So, with all my “ducks in a row”, ready to answer any and all questions he might pose, I approached him. “Dad, Diana K. asked me in class today if I would like to go to Norway with her this summer to visit her relatives.”

Our family knew of Diana’s older brother because he took my sister to prom the previous year. This was the only connection I had with Diana, and I didn’t even know her brother. He and my sister weren’t dating… they were just friends, so my parents didn’t know him either. However, I felt the connection might be enough for my father to tell me I could go.

“Well, what did your mother say?” he asked. “She told me to ask you”, I replied. “I don’t see why not”, was his response. Overjoyed, I ran back to my mother and told her the news! “Oh my”, she responded, with an air of disappointment. Still feeling gleeful, I did not allow the disappointment in her voice to dissuade me from my moment of happiness!.

Times have changed, since my parents and I were raised, yet what really mattered, in my life, was that my parents trusted me enough to allow me to make the decisions I felt were best for me. They gave me the opportunities to learn and grow from the mistakes I made. Coddling me was not in my best interest and they knew it…

With their continued trust in me, I became the independent, confident person I am today!! Thanks, Mom and Dad… I am ETERNALLY grateful!

Blessings Embraced:

• Gentle guidance and encouragement empower people.

• Unconditional love from adults allows children to become who they are meant to be.

Affirmation: With confidence, I trust my own judgement.